Dear self

 hey..

how long has it been already?

to my dear self, you're finally a year older . a little bit wiser but you're definitely still you 10 years ago.

soft and yet loud. hard a the cold marble. but still the spark in you never fades.

and on the day that you've turn a year older, the same day you've lost someone close to you. the same year you've got yourself injured.

and just yesterday, you being in your utmost consideration of not letting others got hurt, you, yourself got injured. 

let's put that aside shall we. this year was something a little bit different. my circle of friends are getting smaller and i'm thankful for those that stayed. I really am.  For all the struggles that i'm going through and have went through, they were there and they make the effort off pulling me up together and not being alone.  being me, i was not able to express my feelings out and talking out of my problems but wit them around, slowly i'm opening up in talking and expressing out my feelings. it's not as easy as it seems as this was what i had went through. thank you for being there at my worst and happiness. 

Dear me, 

this year has been a difficult year and you're still surviving . you're a survivor. you've got this. you can do this . slowly you will be able to spread your wings and fly. healing will never be fast but slowly you'll get over it. the questions that you seek will get answered in the end. the dreams and nightmares that you've had will soon be over. the past will be in the past . the present is the one that you need to look out for. you're capable of  doing that,  you might do it again but don't. Don't let it affect you. to more creating memories and moments. to many more adventures.